insecurity

“Mother Earth and All Her Glory”

“As many women, I’m sure.. When the vagina is mentioned I go to a place of personal embarrassment and insecurity.

I feel I need to share this with you all.. not just to tell a story but to free myself from it. I hate..Capital HATE my vagina. But her and I we have an agreement….
When I was a young girl I was sexually abused on a number of occasions by a female babysitter. I do not share this to shock or upset anyone but simply to help one understand where my vaginal hatred comes from. From this sad experience I began to see my self as dirty and unclean.

Later when I started developing and my labia grew, I felt disgusted with these large shrivelled prune like flaps and how inconveniently uncomfortable they were. In my mind I associated them with being dirty. That’s all it looked like to me… An unclean mess.

Once I began my teen years, the early sexual encounters where less than encouraging.

I realize now it was mainly inexperience that caused the lewd and less than flattering remarks. But try being a teenage girl with all the other insecurities to boot and being told you taste weird.

So anyway the first brilliant encounter came from the least expected of sources and accounts for a rather intense fetish I have these days..A Complete NERD.

He played warhammer and got good grades, wrote poetry ,and hung out with a bunch of other sniggering nerds.. But my GOD… Get this boy alone in the bedroom and you’ve never met someone so keen to please, learn and worship a woman.

So from then on there was only one other insult to my downstairs and that was another instance of abuse. But the damage was already done.. It would take countless amounts of praise and tender love from quite a few broken hearts to even get the hate under control.

Now to present day and I have had another hit to my self esteem. I’m 27 yrs old and have recently under gone a double mastectomy. That’s right the one part of my body I was please with has been lopped off due to a very very early cancer scare.. I took no chances. But my self esteem is still wallowing down the bottom of the well somewhere.

So to present day…. I was just sitting in the bath tub trying to think of what I’d say. What I could tell people that would be inspiring as that’s what people want to hear right.

Well thinking this I began to think over the good, the wonderful and the down right amazing things about my vagina.

And you know what??? There’s plenty to tell you. I am a lucky owner of a vagina capable of multiple earth shaking orgasms. I am the owner of what will hopefully bring a new life into this world. I am the owner of a beautiful pink clam, a soft warm palace, a pussy, a pleasure temple. I have not been told in the past 10 years of my life anything bad about her. She is always complimented on how good she tastes and feels. I was so focused on the negative and afraid of what to tell people that I hadn’t thought of all the good I’ve been told and realized now ..that the bad was only my perception..

So this is what I wanted to share.. Only us as women have the power to make ourselves feel good or bad about our vagina. But next time you feel bad…Remember men don’t give birth to new life.. Vaginas are Mother Earth and All her glory…(as annoying as periods may be !)”

Lucita

“A bit of fluff”

“My partner and I were discussing a vagina mythology of the hairy factor today.

I do think a little less hair is rather handy when your doing something sexy down there, but all in all can’t men and women just accept the way we were created and cherish and appreciate it?  How boring if everyone all had the same designer vagina, and there was no variation in size, colour or style.

The pubic hair’s main function is for protection as I understand, and if on the occasion I decide to shave it all off, I feel very vulnerable, a bit sensitive and can’t quite decide if the couple of days without, looks better or can justify the itchy regrowth and susceptible ingrown hairs.

When I was growing up around age 11 – 13, the amount of hair you had on your legs and bikini line was a huge point of judgement between the girls at school, and must have given me a huge complex as soon as I started growing any pubic hair, and I think how tragic, young woman grow such insecurities so early on in their identities of becoming a woman.

These days I smile when I see a woman strutting her stuff in bikini bottoms with a bit of fluff poking out the side, I think good on you girl, you don’t care what people think, you just do what feels right and accept your body the way you are.”

R.