hate

Summer Confest notebook 2012-13

101 Vagina messages from notebook in the Chai tent at summer Confest 2012-13

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Dear Me,

Please don’t abandon me when you’re having sex and don’t put pressure on me with your expectations around orgasms.

Just let me enjoy the moment
and who I’m with.

Love,
Your Vagina

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I slowly descended through mother earth’s vagina & was reborn :)

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My Yoni is Yoniliciously full of unconditional love to Nathan xo

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Dear Vagina,

We started off a little rocky, I wanted so bad for you to be perfect and the knowledge of how to wield you. As I grew older I grew into you and we became friends. I stopped putting pressure on you, and you began to work with me. We became one, now you share my heart and soul, and for any imperfections or momentary lapsed of cooperation I wouldn’t change you for the world. Let us go forth, to love and light, to amazing sex and beautiful babies, together.

Love, Mother.

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Dear Vagina and dear Penis,

How are you doing and have you been enjoying yourself? I’ve been thinking that maybe you should exercise a little more every now and then because you will create more pleasure.

P.s. I personally think you are mighty fine.

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Dear Vagina,

Like a glowing lotus, you have planted the seed for my inner goddess. You bring sensitivity, nurturing, strength and empowerment.

As I let go to the full exploration of you and my soul, I find peace.

Thank you for showing the divine light in me, opening me up to the possibilities of connection with the Earth, my feminine energy and being open to receiving/honouring the masculine.

Peace and honour and truth.

Love,
Alice

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Dear Vagina,

I love you. I hate you.

I love the pleasure, the eruption and how you can bring me closer to nirvana.

I hate you for the spot of bother you can put me through by leading me astray. I think through you and not through my brain. It gets me in trouble sometimes.

I hope that with patience and time I can learn to only love you and love myself.

Be true to yourself.

Much love,
Jess. xoxo

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“Mother Earth and All Her Glory”

“As many women, I’m sure.. When the vagina is mentioned I go to a place of personal embarrassment and insecurity.

I feel I need to share this with you all.. not just to tell a story but to free myself from it. I hate..Capital HATE my vagina. But her and I we have an agreement….
When I was a young girl I was sexually abused on a number of occasions by a female babysitter. I do not share this to shock or upset anyone but simply to help one understand where my vaginal hatred comes from. From this sad experience I began to see my self as dirty and unclean.

Later when I started developing and my labia grew, I felt disgusted with these large shrivelled prune like flaps and how inconveniently uncomfortable they were. In my mind I associated them with being dirty. That’s all it looked like to me… An unclean mess.

Once I began my teen years, the early sexual encounters where less than encouraging.

I realize now it was mainly inexperience that caused the lewd and less than flattering remarks. But try being a teenage girl with all the other insecurities to boot and being told you taste weird.

So anyway the first brilliant encounter came from the least expected of sources and accounts for a rather intense fetish I have these days..A Complete NERD.

He played warhammer and got good grades, wrote poetry ,and hung out with a bunch of other sniggering nerds.. But my GOD… Get this boy alone in the bedroom and you’ve never met someone so keen to please, learn and worship a woman.

So from then on there was only one other insult to my downstairs and that was another instance of abuse. But the damage was already done.. It would take countless amounts of praise and tender love from quite a few broken hearts to even get the hate under control.

Now to present day and I have had another hit to my self esteem. I’m 27 yrs old and have recently under gone a double mastectomy. That’s right the one part of my body I was please with has been lopped off due to a very very early cancer scare.. I took no chances. But my self esteem is still wallowing down the bottom of the well somewhere.

So to present day…. I was just sitting in the bath tub trying to think of what I’d say. What I could tell people that would be inspiring as that’s what people want to hear right.

Well thinking this I began to think over the good, the wonderful and the down right amazing things about my vagina.

And you know what??? There’s plenty to tell you. I am a lucky owner of a vagina capable of multiple earth shaking orgasms. I am the owner of what will hopefully bring a new life into this world. I am the owner of a beautiful pink clam, a soft warm palace, a pussy, a pleasure temple. I have not been told in the past 10 years of my life anything bad about her. She is always complimented on how good she tastes and feels. I was so focused on the negative and afraid of what to tell people that I hadn’t thought of all the good I’ve been told and realized now ..that the bad was only my perception..

So this is what I wanted to share.. Only us as women have the power to make ourselves feel good or bad about our vagina. But next time you feel bad…Remember men don’t give birth to new life.. Vaginas are Mother Earth and All her glory…(as annoying as periods may be !)”

Lucita